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The Right Nookie Name
Q: Talk about a bedroom faux pas: My girlfriend and I had gone out on the town the other night and we both got kind of buzzed. When we got home we started fooling around which led to a terrific lovemaking session. That is, until I accidentally called her by my ex's name. She kind of freaked out on me and got up and left. Now she won't even speak to me. What can I do? - Duane, Wilmington, NC
A: Why do you think people have goofy nicknames for each other? Shmoopie, Angel Drawers, Ginger Balls . . . whatever! It's a good rule of thumb to stick to nonspecific endearments. The affirmative in any language is also good. One of the King's favorites is a Latino lover's use of "Aiiiiiieee." Muy bien. You may just want to keep your mouth shut (or busy!) if you're worried about becoming Rain Man or Gump doing a black book recital gig.
What to do now? First, get over your ex if you're not already. Then, explain your temporary insanity (could it have been food poisoning?). Make sure you ask for forgiveness, and tell her that she's clearly better than all of those other silly names. Increase your chances of getting forgiveness by doing something for her that she'll love. It may be something you'll love, too. Also, a romantic dinner, that chick flick or event that she wants to go to, or romantic gifts never hurt (hint hint).
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